Are you guilty of these five midlife money myths
Plus, a letter... making the most of your retirement while caring for ageing parents.
In this edition:
Feature: Letter: Making the most of your retirement while caring for ageing parents
The Age/SMH: Are you guilty of supporting these five midlife money myths
From Bec’s Desk: A quick one
Prime Time: How to get your hands on a Retirement CASH Bonus
But first, a little promo for our upcoming Epic Retirement course…
The six week How to Have an Epic Retirement Flagship Course - Spring Edition is now open for earlybird booking. Our six-week get-ready-to-retire program, hosted and run by Bec Wilson kicks off on the 8th August.
You can download a detailed brochure here. Or, click here to book your place.
Hi Bec. I love the podcasts and get a lot out of it. However as a 66 year old retiree , I like many of my friends spend my time caring for my ageing parent and parent in law who wish to live at home , "independently" . This is not the epic retirement I envision but one I may be left with for many years to come. Could you do an episode on how to make the most of this situation as I feel it would be very useful to a lot of people who I know for sure are in exactly the same boat.
Thanks, Lorraine
A great letter Lorraine. Indeed I think many people struggle with this. So I’ve done a longer feature on it.
Letter: Making the most of your retirement while caring for ageing parents
We all dream of a retirement jam packed with leisure, travel, and long-awaited free time to pursue some passions. But the reality of long lives also means our parents are living longer, and at some point they can become quite a responsibility. While it might not be your vision of an epic retirement it really can be a precious gift to be able give a caring parent a good old-age. The key is to find the ways you can make the most of your situation, ensuring your wellbeing is still a priority, and you properly set yourselves and your loved ones up with some balance, if you can.
There’s a few points to consider, even if you planned for this.
Get your head around the new normal
All-too-often we recognise the decline in health of our loved ones a little too late to get them into suitable housing or access to care packages that will support them in an ongoing manner, leaving them dependent on us for their final years.
Whether your caring role was planned or unplanned, it can be tough to work through the animosity you feel for the caring process interrupting what were meant to be your best retirement years. But reframe it. It really can be a precious time, caring for those who have cared for you all your life. And there are ways to get some of your dreams in too. You just might have to delay or reframe them.
Prioritise self-care
Please put your own physical and mental health first. Ensure you maintain regular exercise, eat a healthy and balanced diet, and ensure you get adequate sleep. Your body’s health is paramount. You don’t want to blame these months or years for it going down hill and resenting that later.
Then, really take action on things that are good for your mental health like reading, gardening or spending time with your friends. Don’t hesitate to seek out a counsellor or support group to help you navigate the caregiving role which at times can feel overwhelming and lonely.
Create a support network
There’s a few steps to this one. First, getting other members of your family to take on some of the responsibility. Balance it equally if you can. And second, to put in place professional support so you can get a break.
a) Involve others in the family: Be purposeful in engaging other members of the family in the caregiving process. This allows your load to be lighter, and it’s also good for the whole family, strengthening the bonds. It can be tempting to martyr yourself if your siblings are not as engaged with the caring process, but this will just make it much harder for you to achieve balance in your life, so please resist it.
b) Seek paid support and respite care: Look around for appropriate professional caregivers who can come to the home; as well as respite care options so they can go and stay on-site under professional care for short periods. This can allow you to plan for short breaks to recharge, or even to take a 1-2 week holiday if your loved one's health is manageable.
Foster some independence
Encourage your parents to maintain their independence as much as possible. This not only benefits their mental health but can also reduce your caregiving burden. Small adaptations to their home can make a significant difference, such as installing grab bars, improving lighting, and ensuring easy access to frequently used items. Embrace care in the home, meals that are home-delivered, and even get discuss with the idea of visiting respite care for a period of time if you are unable to come and help. (I know, it’s often not that easy - but try).
Stay actively connected
All too often we retreat from our social circles during difficult times. But I urge you not to. Maintaining social connections is crucial for both you and your parents. Encourage them to stay engaged with their friends and community and support them to do so. For yourself, continue to nurture your social life. Regular interaction with your friends can give you something to look forward to and can provide a much-needed break and emotional support.
“You could even set yourself a little challenge, setting yourself a future goal to travel to a foreign-speaking country you’ve always wanted to learn the language of, and using the time you are caregiving to take language lessons.”
Create and cherish the moments/ consider a collaborative project
I love this. One of our Epic Retirement community members said he spent some of the latter years of his father’s life tracing his family history, sharing his discoveries with his dad as he did it. They would talk, pore over photographs and news clippings and capture old memories. And not long before his father died, he published it into a printed book. He treasures that time spent together now.
While caregiving can be challenging, it’s also an opportunity to create lasting memories with your parents. Cherish the small moments of joy and connection. Whether it’s a shared meal, a walk in the park, or simply reminiscing about the past, these moments can be incredibly rewarding.
Seek out types of fulfillment you can achieve now
Adjust your expectations of retirement for now. Your parents or loved ones won’t need caring forever, and if they do, you’ll eventually find more permanent solutions. So while you are in this phase, make some new, temporary plans and seek fulfillment in new ways. This might include learning a new skill, take up a weekly volunteering gig doing something you’re passionate about, or starting a small project. You could even set yourself a little challenge, setting yourself a future goal to travel to a foreign-speaking country you’ve always wanted to learn the language of, and using the time you are caregiving to take language lessons. You can do this on an app like Duo Lingo at home, or join a local language school and make friends with others doing the same. Whatever you do, make an effort, in the same way you would chase your epic retirement, to find activities that you can integrate into your caregiving routine, allowing you to pursue your passions without compromising your responsibilities.
It’s not going to be easy, but it won’t be forever, so make some temporary plans and keep on working towards that epic retirement. It’s just going to take a different course to the way you originally envisioned it.
Add to the comments some of the lessons you’ve learned if you’ve been trying to balance your epic retirement dreams with caring for a loved one. This article was published as a separate piece before being included in the newsletter, comment here.
Are you guilty of these five midlife money myths?
This article was published in today’s The Age, The Sydney Morning Herald, Brisbane Times and WA Today.
Midlife can be a challenging period when everything seems to weigh heavily on us. Most people in this stage are at the top of their game and under pressure to keep rising. They’re earning the biggest bucks they’ll ever earn.
But they’re also likely saddled with the tail end of the largest mortgage and the most financial responsibilities they’ll ever carry.
They’ve got teenagers or young adults in their home, ageing parents looking for support, a partner they barely find time for and a career they have to keep looking invested in. And they feel the pressure of planning for retirement, too. No wonder so many of us end up in midlife crisis.
To put some light in the tunnel, while running on that wheel, many midlifers take shortcuts and avoid having to do the hard work required to be financially successful into the next stage of life.
There’s lots to choose from – taking on risky investments, hoping for high returns without understanding the market; operating without a budget and spending on ‘whatever we need’; using credit cards to cover shortfalls in income. Then there’s my favourite: putting off retirement saving to free up cash flow in the short term.
But these quick grabs rarely lead to financial stability. And they certainly don’t help you set yourself up for the future.
Instead of falling for these myths, let’s bust them wide open and focus on what truly works for a healthier, wealthier and wiser second half of life.
Myth #1: I don’t have time to focus on my money
Most people in midlife face a common challenge: they don’t prioritise making time to focus on their finances. This lack of attention costs them. They miss the opportunities to understand how financial systems work in the second half of life, set goals for their future and consistently practise the right things to build their wealth.
Yet the changes we need to make, if made at this time of our lives, can make us truly wealthy, even if we have no wealth today to speak of.
What should you prioritise learning about? Superannuation is the big one. As you get closer to retirement age, this system can really bolster your financial security. Investing is also important, as is managing your cash flow sensibly, with a set of financial goals firmly in focus.
I’m not suggesting you should be overly conservative in midlife. But choose the risks carefully and be smart.
Myth #2: I don’t need a budget
Many people in midlife spend as they need and want to, often covering any shortfall with credit cards. In today’s challenging economy this has become more common than we might admit, leading many to find their finances spiralling out of control.
I hate to break it to you: if you want to plan for the future you need a budget. Your budget is the framework that tells you the truth about your spending habits – how much you spend on your cost of living, how much you spend on discretionary items and how much you spend on your lifestyle.
Once you have a budget in place you need to work out how much you have as surplus in that budget every month, after paying your mortgage and your other debts. And finally you need to look hard at the numbers and evaluate whether you should reset the way you spend and save money.
It’s really tough to do when things cost so much. But, as you’ll see below, saving is important in midlife.
Myth #3: Everyone has a new car and drinks fancy wine – I should, too
If you live in the suburbs of a big city it might feel like everyone around you has a new car, a selection of stunning, posh-brand jeans and a passion for fancy wine. I have one message for you: it’s a trap that can delay your retirement one day.
And it’s a common trap in middle-class Australia, where we want to look like we have more than we really do to please people we aspire to be connected with or want to maintain connection with.
Sadly, many people use their credit cards and debt to do this. We buy a new outfit – on credit card or, even worse, Afterpay, to look good “because they saw my blue dress at the last event” or “my jeans are so last year”.
We buy a new car because “everyone’s doing it” and we bring fancy wine to dinner to look good, or worse, we go out and eat fancy when we really can’t afford to.
It’s a hard trap to unwind ourselves from, and you need good friends to be able to do it.
A few years ago our friends got together and agreed on four principles:
There’s more to this article… You can read the rest of this article here in today’s Sydney Morning Herald. It is not behind their paywall, but you may need to sign into their website to read it.
Another week went by, and I spent it planted firmly at my desk, writing, much to my publisher’s delight. It’s been really invigorating to get back to researching new material and creating new ways of explaining things.
Week 6 of the Winter Course has kicked off - the last week - and it will all be over in a flash. That means nearly 500 people have taken the Epic Retirement Course now. I’m delighted! And the reviews and feedback are terrific, which is very humbling. If you are thinking about doing it, our Spring program is on sale. More information can be found on my website here.
On the 25th July I’ll be popping down to Sydney to speak at a half-day retirement event hosted by Financial Advisors, Wattle Partners. It’s called “Making the most of your Golden Years”. My topic is “The six pillars of an Epic Retirement”. And I’m speaking alongside a selection of very interesting people - I’m looking forward to hearing each of them. The Wattle Partners team has been kind enough to offer our Epic Retirement community free admission to the event if it interests you to come along. Here’s a link to the event website where you can register. The coupon code to use for your free pass is EPIC. Might see you there!
If you’re a radio-listener, keep an ear out. I’ve been doing lots of little radio shows throughout Australia. This week I did spots on ABC Brisbane, ABC Hobart and 3AW Melbourne too! I love it, (and I’m no longer nervous!). It’s always a hoot when we get lots of callers weighing in too.
And, in case you haven’t got a copy yet - the book, How to Have an Epic Retirement is still a bestseller on Amazon Australia. 🎉 Buy it here.
Finally, don’t forget to send me your letters. You can always email me at bec@epicretirement.com.au. Until next week… make it epic!
Many thanks! Bec Wilson
Author, podcaster, guest speaker, retirement educator … Visit my website for more info about me, here.
Today we’re talking about retirement bonuses — the one-off and quite large payments offered by an increasing number of superannuation funds to their members at retirement that almost no one seems to know about.
Last week, I covered them extensively in my Epic Retirement newsletter, and in The Age and The Sydney Morning Herald and lots of people wanted me to explain them in person.
It’s complex stuff, so I’ve invited Anne Fuchs, Executive General Manager of Advice, Guidance and Education Australian Retirement Trust, one of Australia’s largest superannuation funds, to chat with me about how they calculate theirs and how it really works.
LISTEN TO THIS EPISODE OF THE PODCAST HERE: